17 August 2002 - 10:52 a.m.

you wake up the next day, and all you remember is that the giant squid are getting bigger.

No, I didn't drink last night, but I think we determined that the giant squid situation was so pressing that now I'm just sitting here, looking out of Gus' window, just waiting for the giant squid to come and take everything over.

Also, I offered to get a Universal Life Church internet certificate to marry my friends at the midnight breakfast buffet at Eat'n'Park, but they hadn't applied for a license. Aw.

Once I become an Internet minister, I am going to need some cool freaking costumes. I don't know as I'd make a very good Elvis, but there's more than enough kitch to go around. Maybe I will dress up like Zsa Zsa Gabor and marry people. That could start an interesting trend.

Mr. Rodgers is a minister in a church around here. I'll bet everyone wants to be married by Mr. Rodgers. I'll bet a Mr. Rodgers look-alike could make a good living with a red sweater and a Universal Life Certificate.

Did I ever tell you about the time KTT told me that Mr. Rodgers was the minister at J-Lo's wedding?

KTT, if you're out there, the Elvis '68 comeback special was on yesterday, and I did not tape it for you.

But I'll marry you anytime you wish at the Eat'n'Park midnight breakfast buffet.

What I'm wearing:

What I'm reading:

What I'm doing after this: