17 July 2002 - 11:34 p.m.

I had 1001 things to say today and then I watched Quiz Show.

I am so tired that I wish I could just smash my fingers against the keys randomly, pretend to be drunk, and hopefully be a smidge entertaining to somebody.

No dice. I blame John Turturro.

THe word smidge always reminds me of three things.

The first is smudge, due to obvious similarities in pronunciation.

The second is Midge, who used to be Barbie's friend before they realized a couple of things: Midge has not been a cool name since Sandra Dee played Gidget, not that they should have stopped producing her, as Barbie and Skipper are really just as bad, and hto redheads often get more attention than hot blondes. Poor Midge.

The third is ice cream. I don't know why I always think that smidge should be an ice cream measurement. I think growing up using the English-cum-American, as opposed to the metric system has instilled me with a bit of hubris. "The length of my hair shall be known as a cherfhore! This much ice cream is heretofore a smidge!"

Scratch what I said abot John Turturro. There is no need to bring his good name into this.

We all know Robert Redford is to blame.

(I feel like Wesley Willis. "Robert Redford is to blame. He made a movie about quiz shows. He also made a movie about other things. He is a good director in the mix. Rock over London, rock on Chicago! Geritol: the cure for tired blood.")

What I'm wearing:

What I'm reading:

What I'm doing after this: