2001-07-20 - 11:47 a.m.

Ok, this is not necessary, unless you happen to stumble across my page today and don't feel like reading old entries. And I'm feeling pretentious after learning a thimbleful of html.

Jenn's Diary FAQ:

Q: Who is Jenn?

A: In the interest of time, she is the person who keeps this diary.

Q: Who is Hatbox?

A: The cutest cat ever. With the exception of Chococat, of course.

Q: Speaking of Chococat, what's with your diary's new look? Why is it so cool?

A: Well, that would be thanks to Gus and his mad teaching skills. And the fact that I was inspired by the DiaryLand Beautification project. Because as much as I heart D-land, they don't give us much in the way of non-ass looking templates.

Q: But who the hell is Gus?

A: He's my boyfriend. He's a computer science major. And yet, we coexist. Ain't love a kick in the head?

Q: Who is your favorite Beatle?

A: George. For a few reasons, and in no particular order. 1.) Aside from not aging well, I think he was the best looking Beatle. 2.) I like his songs. 3) He was true to himself, not in a "I have to be all cool and alternative" way, but in an "I'm not going to sell out because it's all about the music - crap, Eric Clapton loves my wife!"way. 4.) He was the best actor. 5.) He is nicest to me in the dreams I have about the Beatles. 6.) In the words of my Rock'n'Roll Film Festival professor: "Yeah, George is the one you'd want to talk to in the morning." 7.) He is Cynthia Plaster Caster's favorite. Which is not a reason to like George so much as something I have in common with Cynthia. And you can never have too much in common with Cynthia Plaster Caster.

Q: Who is Penny Hatpin?

A: I'm not at liberty to say. However, I am working on a way give aliases to everyone with whom I work, just in case. Jess suggested totally random names like Phil Donahue, but that might confuse even me.

Q: How do you REALLY feel about FAQs?

A: Well, let me ask you this. How often are FAQs actually made up of real qustions people REALLY asked? I might not feel the need to satirize them just to crack myself up, if I didn't think they were totally artificial, by and large.

Q: What are you doing right now?

A: The most gratifying part of my job - tearing up the applications of people who didn't win various scholarships. Not that I don't feel sorry for the losers, just that getting paid to release some of my pent-up office frustration makes my day a little more bearable.

Q: What did you have for lunch?

A: Meeting leftovers - good lentils and ass dolmathes.

Q: Anything interesting in those scholarship apps?

A: Here's quite the little gem: "One decision I made before most of my peers was to start collage at 16." That's funny, most teen girls start making their post-elementary school collages at around the age of 12 or 13, to extol the radness of their friends and crush objects. No wonder this chick was #17 on the wait list.

Q: Anyting else we should know.

A: Not really. Except that at this moment, I am being seized with an urge to lean back in my rolly chair, take a swig of my Coke, and sigh, "Ahhh, FAQs. Taking online vanity to a whole new level."

What I'm wearing:

What I'm reading:

What I'm doing after this: